Portland - Page 68

Oregon Reassures Residents After Cyberattack: ‘Don’t Worry, Your Data’s Probably Fine, Maybe, Who Knows.’

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Share This ArticleSALEM, OR — After hackers dumped 1.3 million files from the Oregon Department of Environmental Quality onto the dark...

Sources Confirm Neighborhood Child Might Even Go Outside This Weekend

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Share This ArticleU.S. — In a development no one saw coming, sources have confirmed that 12-year-old neighborhood resident Brandon Lunsford might...

America Faces Crisis: No More Drunk 2AM Taco Runs as Jack in the Box Shutters Nationwide

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Share This ArticleU.S. — In a move described by many as a "direct attack on poor decision-making," Jack in the Box...

Local Man Casually Stands at Edge of Lawn for 45 Minutes Just to Let Everyone Know He Did That

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Share This ArticleBEND, OR — Sources confirm that 53-year-old Brian Halverson spent approximately 45 full minutes this past Saturday standing silently...

Sad: Oregon Creamery’s Full Tub of Ice Cream Now Just a Tiny Micro-Pint Thanks to Inflation

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Share This ArticleOREGON — In yet another crushing blow to dessert lovers and economic optimism, Oregon-based creamery Tillamaybe has officially replaced...

Grandma Pies and Pesto Bites Land at Little Beast’s Beer Garden

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As of Thursday, April 24, Little Beast Brewing’s beer garden is leveling up: Prettyboy Pizza is moving in, slinging grandma pies, pesto bites, and...

Matsunoki Ramen Brings Its Buzzy Artisan Bowls of Tonkotsu to Mississippi Avenue

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Following years of success and tens of thousands of steaming ramen bowls sold, Pine Street Market staple Matsunoki Ramen has expanded into its first...

Oregon Democrats Introduce Bill to Replace Axe Throwing With Safe Space Rubber Dart Toss

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Share This ArticleSALEM, OR — Concerned that the ancient, rugged art of axe throwing may be promoting toxic masculinity, Oregon Democrats...

Portland’s Hottest New Speakeasy Is… in the Airport?

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Portland has a complicated relationship with speakeasies. On the one hand, they’re weird, which we tend to like. But on the other hand, they...
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