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SALEM, OR — After hackers dumped 1.3 million files from the Oregon Department of Environmental Quality onto the dark web, state officials quickly reassured the public with the kind of soothing, half-hearted optimism that has become an Oregon trademark: “Don’t worry, your data’s probably fine, maybe, who knows.”
The DEQ, responsible for regulating the air, water, and now apparently the free flow of private citizen data across the dark web, admitted they have no idea how much was actually stolen. “We think most of it was just employee records,” said one spokesperson while nervously refreshing their Gmail inbox, “but it could also be everyone’s car registrations and
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