Portland

Mayor Says Community Would Benefit From A Much Bigger Dick’s

Portland
Share This ArticleEUGENE, OREGON — City leaders say they’re exploring plans to bring a much bigger Dick’s to the area, a...

Portland Gyms Eliminate Heavy Weights After City Officials Agree Masculinity Is Offensive To Several Pronouns

Portland
Share This ArticlePORTLAND, Ore. — Several Portland fitness centers announced this week they will be eliminating traditional heavy weights from their gyms entirely after...

Oregon Official Governing Portland Region From Spain, Calls It “Occasional” Visit

Portland
Share This ArticleAccording to reporting from The Oregonian/OregonLive, an Oregon elected official has been attending Metro Council meetings remotely for months...

Portland Hospitals Report 38% Increase In Genderless Babies Born With Naturally Occurring Blue Hair

Portland
Share This ArticlePORTLAND, OR — Doctors across Portland say they are closely studying a surprising new trend after hospitals reported a...

Eugene Protester Hospitalized After Attacking Moving SUV At 6th And Pearl

Portland
Share This ArticleIf you ever wondered what happens when you block traffic, jump on a stranger’s vehicle, and start smashing their...

Wyden Appears Lost In Thought, Likely Recalling The Time Dysentery Almost Took Him Out In 1848

Portland
Share This ArticleWASHINGTON—Sen. Ron Wyden appeared visibly distant during a routine budget hearing Tuesday, staring solemnly into space as if mentally...

Portland Trail Blazers – New Documentary Raises Question Of Which Blazers Era Is The Best

Portland
Netflix is scheduled to release a documentary in early April focused on the late 1990s Portland Trail Blazers teams – or the...

Kyron Horman’s Name Appears In Epstein Files, But It Ultimately Leads Nowhere

Portland
Share This ArticleWhen we first saw chatter online about Kyron Horman being “mentioned in the Epstein files,” we’ll be honest with...

Local Gang Member Cancels Planned Robbery After Learning New Gun Law Takes Effect Monday

Portland
Share This ArticlePORTLAND, OR — In a stunning triumph for modern public policy, local gang member Rico “Lil Torque” Martinez announced...

Eugene Teen Shot In The Head Is Now Awake As Police Arrest Juvenile Suspect

Portland
Share This ArticleThe 14 year old boy who was critically injured in last week’s shooting is now awake, alert, and talking...

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