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New Study Finds 97% of Streaming Time Spent Just Scrolling Across 6+ Subscriptions

Share This ArticleIn a groundbreaking study that surprises absolutely no one, researchers have confirmed that 97% of the average person's time...

“Eugene Squirrels Are Straight-Up Trippin’ After Being Fed Psilocybin Mushrooms,” Officials Say

Share This ArticleEUGENE, OR — City officials are urging residents to stop feeding psychedelic mushrooms to local squirrels, after what one...

Weekend BBQ Plans Proceed as Dad Secures Down Payment on Ribeyes

Share This ArticleSWEET HOME, OR — After weeks of intense financial planning and one extremely awkward meeting with a steak loan...

Parents Sit Teen Down for “American Dream Talk,” Gently Explain He’ll Be Renting a Carpeted Garage Corner for $2,400

Share This ArticleSalem, Oregon — In a moving display of parental love mixed with economic nihilism, local couple Doug and Melissa...

That Methy Neighbor Wearing Headlamp at 2:30AM Is Just One Bolt Away From Wrapping It Up

Share This ArticleSPRINGFIELD, OR — Residents of a quiet suburban street were once again reassured by the familiar clanking of socket...

The Strip-Mall Family Restaurant Serving Some of Portland’s Best Steaks

It’s 4:57 p.m., a few minutes before open, and a family of regulars have posted up at the door of Pho Kita. A young...

Bend Transplant Really Getting Sick of Californians Acting Like They Belong Here Too

Share This ArticleBEND, OR — Brad Collins, a proud Bend transplant who moved from San Diego just 13 months ago, is...

10 Out of 10 Oregon Hikers Admit Trail Was ‘Just Okay’ Until the Edibles Kicked In

Share This Article“At first it was just trees. Then it was THE trees.” OREGON CASCADES — A groundbreaking new study from...

This Vegan Fast-Food Restaurant in a Former McDonald’s Is Out to Change the World

Pejorism, the belief the world is getting worse, is a widely held sentiment. Can fast food make it a bit better? Matt Plitch, CEO...

BREAKING: Portland Resident Offended by This Headline and Also the Word ‘Resident’

Share This ArticlePORTLAND, OR — Chaos erupted in a local community Slack channel today after a Portland man reportedly became deeply...

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