Share This Article
EUGENE, OR — A shocking new study released Monday has confirmed what many suspected all along: meth users are now the world’s foremost experts in unattended tool acquisition, also known in some legal circles as “theft.”
The study, conducted by researchers who asked to remain anonymous for “obvious reasons,” found that meth users have developed an uncanny sixth sense for locating power tools left unattended in driveways, open garages, or truck beds with a slightly cracked window.
“We were stunned,” said Dr. Karen Watts, lead researcher. “They can smell a DeWalt drill from 300 yards away. We once observed a subject locate and extract an entire Craftsman
→ Continue reading at That Oregon Life