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Cracker Company Unveils New, Even Flakier Saltines, Perfect for Couch Snacking

Share This ArticleIn a move no one saw coming—but somehow everyone expected—Nabisco has unveiled its newest twist on the classic saltine: a...

Man Angry at Crowds on “Secret” Waterfall Hike Forgets He’s Part of the Crowd

Share This ArticleSomewhere Deep in the Wilderness — Self-proclaimed hiking purist Brent "NaturePurist87" Henderson, 34, was reportedly furious Sunday morning after discovering...

Governor Kotek Consults Psychic Medium to Finally Get a Response from Trump

Share This ArticleSALEM, OR — Frustrated by the complete lack of communication from the Trump administration regarding Oregon’s frozen federal funding, Governor...

New Law Requires Drivers to Telepathically Predict Cyclists’ Next Move

Share This ArticlePortland’s latest progressive traffic law aims to bridge the “understanding gap” between drivers and cyclists PORTLAND, OR – In an unprecedented move that...

Oregon Breakfast Joints Insist You Bring Your Own Eggs—Or Indulge in Their ‘Invisible Omelet’

Share This ArticleOregon diners looking forward to a hearty breakfast might need to start checking their fridges before heading out. In a...

Boss at Home Genuinely Cares About Your Safety As Roads Ice Over, Suggests Leaving Earlier

Share This ArticleIn a heartwarming display of corporate compassion, local work-from-home boss Greg Daniels—cozy in his flannel pajama pants—has reassured his employees...

REPORT: Oregonians See First Snowflake, Immediately Forget How to Drive, Walk, and Function

Share This ArticleOREGON – In a shocking turn of events that happens literally every single year, Oregonians have once again been caught completely off guard...

Oregon State Parks Introduce Monthly Hiking Plans With New “TrailFlix” App

Share This ArticleHiking in Oregon just got a whole lot more exclusive. Following in the footsteps of every streaming service, gym membership, and software company,...

Greater Idaho Expands: “We’re Taking All of Oregon, But Portland’s Getting Walled Off”

Share This ArticleIn a stunning turn of events, the Greater Idaho movement has thrown out its old map, crumpled it into a wad of regret,...

Facebook User Stunned to Discover His Rant Didn’t Instantly Change the Other Guy’s Mind

Share This ArticleBoring, Oregon — In what experts are calling an unprecedented failure of logic and reason, a local man in Boring,...

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